And now I'm terrified. Every time he eyes up my butt I want to grab the nearest chastity belt. I kid, I kid. But seriously, one of the keys to anal is to be relaxed and totally game for it, which it doesn't sound like you are. You need to take the pressure off. Doesn't matter if you've been dating for a week or married for ten years, you should never feel like you have to do something in bed that you're not comfortable with. Pure and simple. So maybe tell the bf he needs to think of your butt as a beautiful sculpture at a museum; he can look all he wants, but he can't touch. Anal sex, like sushi and socialism, is not for everyone. Then again, I know lots of women who really enjoy anal and have it play a minor and major roll in their sex lives.
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If I had a nickel for the number of times someone has approached me on the street, grabbed me by the shoulders, and shouted, "FRANK! Primarily because people don't ever recognize me on the street, and also because that's a strange question to lead with. But the point still stands that there's a male obsession with the butt hole that women, especially women who aren't into anal stimulation, don't understand. Here's why guys are so into it. It feels completely different than vaginal sex. It's like this: What if you found out your partner had a second penis that they never used for sex, and you knew that this penis would give you a different sensation during intercourse? Wouldn't you want to try that? Except your partner says he doesn't want to do it that way because it's gross because he uses that penis to poop.
Anal sex avoids intimacy – cue the commitment-phobes
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